Seasons Change

We all have seasons in our lives....some better than others. I feel like I've had many this year. I've had a season of brokeness followed by a season in the desert and then finally a season of rejoicing for all God did in the latter. Now I'm in a season of growth and it's honestly a beautifully challenging time for me. But as you know..we're not always in the same season at the same time....which I think is such a merciful, gracious thing God does for us sometimes because when I couldn't walk 6 months ago....those that could held me up. And now that that season has passed and I feel like I've come out of the desert for now I've noticed that some of my dear friends around me are now in their own desert. As I'm able to reflect on my own recent time there and see them in the midst of theirs I am reminded of a line from a Caedmon's Call song that says "the valleys fill first". I always grab onto word pictures and that's always a refreshing one for me when the valley is where I find myself placed. Knowing that the valley is not where I will stay. While I think valleys and deserts...or whatever you want to call them.....serve a purpose in our sanctification process....that doesn't always necessarily make it pleasant and lacking of pain. Even though we know the pain is going to bring about something greater....in the midst of it....sometimes it takes everything in you to keep a crawl let alone a walk.
So as I look around me and observe the different seasons people are in....I think it's important to be reminded that seasons change....but it's all for his glory. Psalm 139:16 says that all the days ordained for me were written in His book before one of them came to be. So in the midst of a good season...or maybe a not so good season....we can still rejoice that we are exactly where we are supposed to be doing the things he has for us to do for his eternal purpose.
Acts 17:26 says that "from one man he made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth, and he determined the times set for them and the exact places they should live." It goes on to say he does this SO that men would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from each one of us." He knows everything about this point in our lives and what it would bring for us.....so we can reach out and find him. I love how Jesus never yells out "hey you need me, so get over here" But he just allows circumstances to take place in our lives, he waits patiently....all to usher us into his presence because he loves us and desires for his glory to be known.
So sometimes he gives us "purposeful frustration" so that we would know him more and our desperation for him would become more evident. Further more this frustration fulfills Romans 8 saying that we have been "subjected to frustration, not by choice, but by the will of the one who has subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brough into the glorious freedom of the children of God." Paul says that he considers "that our present suffeing is not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed to us" He desires for us to walk so closely with him and his promise is that it will be glorious. That is a promise I am clinging to. A sweet friend of mine said recently "I want him to consume us all until we see nothing but him." I sat and thought about that statement for a little bit and then I just smiled and thought....that would be great. And I resolve that if it takes valleys and frustration to get there....that maybe my present suffereing isn't anything compared to the glory that is to come.
Sometimes we thnk if the circumstance just changes that we will then be satisfied. But how true is that? Maybe the source of my frustration in the circumstance is my heart is being unfilled and unsatisfied by the love and presence of an almighty God. We try to fix an unfixable problem- a God shaped hole that will never be filled by anything or anyone but Him. So maybe we shouldn't try to rush what God is doing in our seasons....good or bad....but take it as a reminder that a void exists in our souls without Him. In the midst of sittin in a valley that becomes our greatest hope, knowing we can't take another step without him. Even more, we find that when we abide in Him, we don't just survive, we thrive. We thrive to the point in which we overflow and bless others immensely. So for those that fill their void- that aching abyss- with Christ, it is then that life is truly lived and frustration-deep inner, aching frustration -becomes glorious.

Spiritual Buffalo

I read an article a while back by Sara Groves....and it's one that I mentally refer back to often because I love the point the author was making. She explained a scene from the movie "Dances with Wolves" where the Sioux Indians are preparing for a buffalo hunt. Apparently they hadnt seen buffalo in a while and Kevin Costner's character tips them off to where some can be found. So they spend time preparing for the hunt....dancing, dressing, preparing horses and hunting supplies. Then the next morning they go to where they expect to see hundreds of buffalo, and instead find hundreds of buffalo carcasses strewn across the prairie.
The author continued to talk about how in the Sioux culture they made use of every part of the buffalo and nothing was wasted..the bladder carried water, the bones made tools, the skin made clothing. Whoever had done this had taken the best part for themselves and left the rest to rot. The Sioux did not have time to make good use of the dead buffalo so it was impossible to redeem.
She then goes on to point out her own realization that she was not using all of her spiritual buffalo. We live in a society of consumption and aquisition and most of our spiritual resources are for us to develop our spiritual maturity and to help push us to deeper depths. But the question she poses to herself is that is she just taking the best parts of the buffalo for herself? Was her spiritual life just one of consumption and aquisition?

I love this analogy. I think it's something we could all plea guilty to at some point. I know I can. And it made me ask myself those very questions....am I just taking the best parts for myself? Am I using all of my spiritual buffalo? Am I joining Him in the work that he has created me to do...or am I just being a spiritual glutton on the resources he has blessed me with? Am I being poured out as an offering? What am I not tapping into to make good use of my life?

This analogy always serves as a good reminder to me and when he brings it to my thoughts all I can do is beg and plead that he would continue to teach me how to use all he has given me to do the work he has prepared and created me to do.

l'amor che move il sole e l'altre stelle...

Dante uses these words to describe God as "the love that moves the sun and the other stars". The words themselves sound beautiful simply because they are written in what is thought by many to be the most romantic langugage in the world, but when you realize what they actually mean you are struck by the the beauty of our God. When I read this it reminded my heart that God is in the details. He is the love that moves the sun and the stars in place....every day! He knows the number of hairs on my head, he knit me in the womb and created my inmost being, he knows when I rise and when I sit, he is familiar with all my ways. In that moment when I read the meaning of those words I was reminded that I am loved by a God who is intimate with the details, not just the big picture. Details are what seperate a mere aquaintance from an intimate friend. An intimate friend knows the details...the habits, the likes, the dislikes, the joys, the struggles....they are familiar with the details of what makes you...you. And when you are hemmed into that kind of intimacy you feel known... and you can just be. That sentence made me realize that I love that about the Lord. He has hemmed me in....he knows the ins and outs of who I am...he's well versed in the details of me....I am known.....and in his presence....I can just be.